May. 1st, 2017

sabotabby: (doctor who)
 After this piece of dreck.

MEDIUM SHOTS OF SIX INDIVIDUALS ON A WHITE BACKDROP, SPEAKING DIRECTLY INTO THE CAMERA.

BONEHEAD

I would describe my political views as the new right.

FEMINIST

I'd say that I'm left.

Title: TWO STRANGERS DIVIDED BY THEIR BELIEFS.

NARRATOR (V/O)

She believed that she was a full person entitled to human rights. He believed that she should be making him a sandwich. Is it possible that the truth lay somewhere in the middle?

A buzzer, much like one you might hear in a prison, buzzes.

INT. WAREHOUSE

Title: MEET FOR THE FIRST TIME

Each pair faces each other over a pile of flat pack IKEA boxes.

BONEHEAD

Feminism today is man hating.

FEMINIST

I would describe myself as a feminist 100%

Title: EACH KNOWS NOTHING ABOUT THE OTHER OR WHAT THIS EXPERIMENT INVOLVES

DOUCHE

I don't believe that climate change exists.

SMUG ENVIRONMENTALIST

I drive a Prius with Bernie Sanders stickers on it!

TRANS WOMAN

I'm, like, a person and stuff.

TRANSPHOBE

I'm more obsessed with strangers' genitals than a normal person should be.

Title: IS THERE MORE THAT UNITES THAN DIVIDES?

WHITE CISMALE HETEROSEXIST SUPREMACY

*Intensifies*

The pairs are presented with the flat pack boxes.

DOUCHE

I got this. I am a man and therefore an expert in IKEA.

Montage of each pair struggling over the instructions.

BONEHEAD

I think this is in some kind of furrin' language or some such.

TRANS WOMAN

What *is* a KUGGALLÂ, anyway?

FEMINIST

I think this is missing a piece. Maybe all the pieces.

Close-up of shelf, assembled with all of the pieces facing the wrong way and some random bit dangling.

SMUG ENVIRONMENTALIST

Aaaah, just hold the—this thing—for an—OWWW.

TRANSPHOBE

This has to go in that hole, there's no other hole that it can go in.

DOUCHE, screaming his head off, tosses a board into the wall.

SMUG ENVIRONMENTALIST sinks sadly into a pile of cardboard boxes, his face in his hands.

TRANS WOMAN stabs TRANSPHOBE in the eye with an Allen key.

TRANSPHOBE
Sooooo much for the tolerant left...

FEMINIST (CRYING)

I...can't. I just...can't do it.

Long shot. Everyone is crying and/or bleeding. Clawing herself across the floor, FEMINIST finds a case of Heineken and cracks one open. DOUCHE reaches for her.

FEMINIST

You! Stay away! I will fucking glass you.

Montage of everyone sobbing into a beer amongst the wreckage of half-assembled furniture and battered cardboard boxes.

Title: HEINEKEN: IT CAN'T SOLVE RACISM, SEXISM, TRANSPHOBIA, OR CLIMATE CHANGE DENIALISM, BUT IT WILL EASE THE PAIN OF YOUR COMPLETE AND UTTER FAILURE.

BLACK.

sabotabby: raccoon anarchy symbol (Default)
avocado pasta

AVOCADO PASTA

 

INGREDIENTS:

• 12 ounces spaghetti

• 2 ripe avocados, halved, seeded and peeled

• 1/2 cup fresh basil leaves

• 2 cloves garlic

• 2 tablespoons freshly squeezed lemon juice

• Kosher salt and freshly ground black pepper, to taste

• 1/3 cup olive oil

• 1 cup cherry tomatoes, halved

• 1/2 cup canned corn kernels, drained and rinsed


DIRECTIONS:

1. In a large pot of boiling salted water, cook pasta according to package instructions; drain well.

2. To make the avocado sauce, combine avocados, basil, garlic and lemon juice in the bowl of a food processor;

season with salt and pepper, to taste. With the motor running, add olive oil in a slow stream until emulsified;

set aside.

3. In a large bowl, combine pasta, avocado sauce, cherry tomatoes and corn.

4. Serve immediately.


This is delicious and dead easy. A++ would cook again, especially if I were using my own awesome blender and not the school's shitty one.

Profile

sabotabby: raccoon anarchy symbol (Default)
sabotabby

June 2017

S M T W T F S
    12 3
45678 910
11 12 131415 1617
1819 2021 22 2324
252627282930 

Style Credit

Page generated Jun. 25th, 2017 03:40 am
Powered by Dreamwidth Studios

Expand Cut Tags

No cut tags

Most Popular Tags