I think my favourite line was "Drive your tongue into the holy sacrament before your angry member violates its ramparts!", actually. But yes, much musical potential. In particular, I think "squirming anal burrow" needs to be the name of some sort of experimental industrial noise band.

And if you liked that one, you'll love the follow-up someone posted today, after finding another work by the same author: http://weepingcock.livejournal.com/625439.html

Some choice phrases this time around:

"exciting anal assault"
"virgin royal butt orifice"
and perhaps most terrifying/hilarious of all: "snapping ass lips"

SNAPPING. ASS. LIPS.

But of course, as is usual with weepingcock, it's often the comments that are the funniest. this one in particular just about killed me.