Although I've read and enjoyed all of this post I have found it quite hard mentally to get beyond the snap-off track pants angle. He's trying to pick up women while wearing jogging bottoms, and is surprised when this venture does not meet with success. Jogging bottoms worn in a non-jogging environment screams "I find the zips and buttons on other trousers excessively challenging and secretly wish we could all go back to wearing giant Baby-Gros like when I was one. Because everything was better when I was one and just hanging off some woman's tit of the time." I know the Old bill are meant to be rubbish for dealing with sexual harrassment cases but surely a quick call to the fashion police is in order.