Blogcember: Pizza preferences

[sabotabby]

bitter_crimson asked about pizza preferences. I have strong opinions on pizza, you guys.

First of all, what is with some pizzas not having tomato sauce now? This is unacceptable. Besides a crust that is pizza-shaped (here's where the New Yorkers and the Chicagoans start arguing about crust, I guess), tomato sauce is what defines a pizza and makes it Good or Not Good. I like pesto as much as the next person but putting it on a pizza is pretentious and a sign that you have deficiencies as a human being.

Second, I like thin crust over thick, though obviously it needs to be thick enough to accommodate the fuckton of toppings that I like on it. Whole wheat is nice if done well, but it's usually not done well. Crust exists solely as a delivery method for toppings; I don't know why people get so uptight about it.

Let's talk toppings. Top tier: black olives, grilled eggplant, artichokes, jalapeno peppers, broccoli, and mushrooms (preferably portobello but I'm not actually that picky). Put any of these on pizza and I'm happy.

Second tier: green olives, tomatoes, banana peppers, goat cheese, and spinach. These are all good too.

Third tier: non-spicy peppers, onions, extra cheese that's not goat cheese. Fine, happy to eat it, but you went for one of the default vegetarian pizzas, didn't you?

Bad: Any kind of non-tomato fruit. Like pineapple. That's disgusting. Meat, obvs. I'm not particularly keen on sun-dried tomatoes but you can pick those off, so.

Adding extra garlic, chilli flakes, and basil is always a good thing.

Now I'm craving pizza.

Comments

[radiumhead.livejournal.com]

I like it either really thick or really thin.

Only acceptable toppings to me: pepperoni, sausage, bacon.

If anything else is on it i will freak the fuck out. Especially if its olives or mushrooms.

[sabotabby]

Mmmm, olives. Oh wait, I have a whole bunch of olives upstairs that I can eat.

[fatpie42.livejournal.com]

I've never quite understood the appeal of olives. I have only enjoyed olives in one place, and that was because they were stuffed with other things. I'm not sure I can say I like olives when the only case where I've enjoyed them has been when they've been served with something that makes them taste less like olives. I don't know what those olives were stuffed with. Definitely included peppers. I think the thing is that olives are so bitter and peppers are kind of sweet, so the result was a lot easier to enjoy.

[sabotabby]

I like bitter and salty things. Make all the jokes you want.

[fatpie42.livejournal.com]

:P

[radiumhead.livejournal.com]

My favorite bar has awesome thin crust margerita pizza, but it is not available on the weekend, which makes me sad. The regular pizza places only have thicker slices.

[sabotabby]

That is unfortunate. Pizza is the one of the best drunk foods.

[bitter-crimson.livejournal.com]

haha I HAD A PESTO PIZZA ONE TIME IN SANTA FE and liked it ;p

i always order my pizza cheeseless b/c of my lactose intolerance and have had many conversations with my housemates about how i am a heathen and that doesn't count as pizza etc. etc.

never had broccoli on pizza that i can remember, now curious 2 try it. i do like broccoli a lot!

[sabotabby]

There are lots of good reasons to order pizza cheeseless. None of them apply to me, however. I like me some cheese.

I had broccoli on pizza in Italy and never forgot it. A few places have it here, and it's exciting. I like broccoli on everything.

[fatpie42.livejournal.com]

I must say, I was surprised at the inclusion of broccoli too. Love broccoli, but on pizza? I mean sure it doesn't sound weird like pineapple, but it's still outside my pizza-eating experience.

[sabotabby]

Try it! It's good. But I am demented in my broccoli love.

[franklanguage.livejournal.com]

The best reason to order pizza cheeseless? Dairy is Cancer Fuel.

That said, I had a wonderful slice of Pizza By the Pound at PIE; it was a red pie with capers, and they threw some Daiya™ dairy-free cheese on it. (Made of cassava, not soy.) Thin, crispy crust.

Notably, they have many gluten-free options, although most of the crusts are made with wheat. I have a feeling my feet will start leading me there more often.

[the-siobhan.livejournal.com]

When BC & I were in Italy I made a point of eating pizza in every city we visited. They are surprisingly different.

Naples had the best pizza I have ever eaten in my life. Hands down.

[the-siobhan.livejournal.com]

Also, Venice had "American pizza". Which is pizza with french fries on top.

[sabotabby]

I feel like even Americans aren't that horrifying.

[princealberic.livejournal.com]

American tourists are the actual worst and someone is buying that pizza (or they wouldn't make it) so that must be more than a coincidence.

[sabotabby]

...you're probably right. Oh God, I hate the world.

[frandroid.livejournal.com]

Come on, you would try that even once? Well, Imma gonna make it.

[sabotabby]

No. I'm anti-starch-on-starch. It tastes weird and makes me fall asleep.

[coconuthead.livejournal.com]

Oh no. We are.

[princealberic.livejournal.com]

That exists elsewhere in Italy, I've seen those everywhere in Florence and it's so horrible. And there are different kinds of fries, even. I've never tried it because it looks so gross, but I ate one that had thin potato slices on it and I kind of liked it, even though I'd never be able to eat a lot of it.

I've been told they're made for tourists, especially Germans and Americans.

[the-siobhan.livejournal.com]

Amatos in Toronto used to have a potato pizza that was quite good - it was thick potato wedges with a white cream sauce and a light-tasting cheese. The potatoes weren't fried and it was really tasty.

Actually, I take that back. It had no tomato sauce so it was more of a "good tasting dish on a round bread-product crust" than actually a pizza.

[sabotabby]

Actually, I take that back. It had no tomato sauce so it was more of a "good tasting dish on a round bread-product crust" than actually a pizza.

This is correct.

(Minus the good tasting—I used to hate that stuff whenever I had to eat it. I like one starch at a time.)

[coconuthead.livejournal.com]

Ha! I'm sorry I missed that.

[princealberic.livejournal.com]

Crust exists solely as a delivery method for toppings; I don't know why people get so uptight about it.

I would agree, but sometimes thin crust can improve a pizza by 200%. It is known.

You have a great taste in toppings because I like all of the ones you mentioned. Except I also like the ones you dislike (except meat, we can agree that it sucks).

I'm craving pizza too. You should put this under a cut with a "WILL MAKE YOU CRAVE PIZZA" warning, because the fact that I no longer live within walking distance of 3 different pizza places is a problem. :P

[sabotabby]

It is known. But thick crust won't inherently make me hate a pizza if everything else is good.

I live right near a pizza place, but it's not a good one, unless you order and make them stick jalapenos on it.

[smhwpf.livejournal.com]

Crust exists solely as a delivery method for toppings

Oh, no no no, crust is very much part of the deal. This is why pizza only really works when done in pizza ovens. A really well baked crust, not too hard, not too soft, the right level of crispyness, really makes the pizza and brings out the toppings.

Definitely with your top tier, except maybe broccoli. I like broccoli, but on pizza.. bit meh. But for a good vege pizza, mushrooms are the sine qua non IMO, unless you go for a pure Margharita.

What are your thoughts on Gorgonzola?

[sabotabby]

I would have thought so, but I've had cupric_acetate's pizza, which to my knowledge has never seen the inside of a pizza oven. She also singlehandedly transformed my opinion on whole wheat crust.

I am very much pro-Gorgonzola! I'd prefer it to mozzarella, though not in addition to.

[fatpie42.livejournal.com]

Presumably this means that while it might not HAVE to be done in a pizza oven, the alternative method would have to be able to make up for not being a pizza oven in some way. The conclusion here seemingly being that there is a particularly specific right way in regards to how the crust is handled, not just the toppings.

[sabotabby]

It's just that she's a baking genius, basically.

[lienne.livejournal.com]

Yessss. Magical baking goddess :D

[frandroid.livejournal.com]

Maybe she has a pizza baking stone. Which pretty much affords you the "pizza oven at home" experience.

[lokilokust.livejournal.com]

that settles it, i'm making a pizza.
(homemade white whole wheat crust, homemade fresh tomato sauce, buffalo tempeh, shallot, shiitake bacon, jalapenos, and a bit of nutritional yeast.)

[sabotabby]

I'd eat the shit out out that. Yum!

[lokilokust.livejournal.com]

it was fantastic.
it's funny, i'm not one of those PIZZA FOREVER AND ALWAYS folks, but a truly great pizza is a wonderful thing.

[lienne.livejournal.com]

Hahaha, my pizza preferences are almost completely opposed to yours. Except about garlic, basil, and broccoli. Tomato's OK too. But any kind of pepper, mushroom, olive, or onion is the work of the devil. And we all know my feelings on pineapple and how it needs to get in my face.

[sabotabby]

It's a wonder that we've ever managed to compromise. :)

[chickenfeet2003.livejournal.com]

Anchovies!

[sabotabby]

Ugh ugh and yuck.

[chickenfeet2003.livejournal.com]

Srsly. Anchovies and black olives, with or without cheese, are my favourite pizza toppings. This choice is heartily endorsed by LJG.

[chickenfeet2003.livejournal.com]

Also, have you ever seen a pizza Rossini? Truly gross.

[sabotabby]

I just Googled that. WTF are those things?

[frandroid.livejournal.com]

We just bought a Cuisinart stand mixer, so there should be a lot more pizza in our future.

[sabotabby]

Awesome.

[50-ft-queenie.livejournal.com]

Hubby and I like very savoury pizzas. Anchovies, black olives, green peppers, mushrooms, roasted garlic, extra cheese.

[sabotabby]

I like all of that except anchovies.

[firecat]

White pizza is not new, however much some hipster chefs want to pretend they invented it.

[sabotabby]

Oh, I know it's been around for awhile. I still don't like it.

[misslynx.livejournal.com]

Hmmm. You and I have about an 85% overlap in our pizza preferences. Here are the salient differences:

* Sun-dried tomatoes are a first-tier topping for me.
* Pineapple is not anathema to me, it is second-tier or thereabouts.
* Regular white mushrooms are a third-tier topping for me. All other mushrooms - portobello, oyster, etc. - are emphatically first-tier.

And the big one... I actually like sauces other than tomato sauce on pizza. Sometimes.

[sabotabby]

Heretic! :)