We love you! We will protect you from all many-legged crawly things! Unless we get bored of them, first, that is.
We do not like the taste of the house centipedes. Besides, how would you know we loved you if we didn't bring our prey to you? And how would you know what clever, cunning, sadistic little carnivores we are if we didn't show you how we can make the buggses skitter?
We like it when the bugses skitter. It amuses us.
You're always saying we should play nicely together. We wanted to show you that we know how! Now you are telling us not to play in front of you. Bad parents send mixed messages, you know.
Anyway, we're going to ignore you, because we're cats, and that's what we do. Also because you haven't proffered any kittytreats or shot us with a water pistol.
And your bed is the bestest stashing place for dead things ever! Because you find them, and make amusing noises. The other monkey never looks under her bed, unless she needs a sweater. (And she's very annoyingly encased the sweaters in icky plastic stuff so that we can't shed on them and they don't make comfy kitty beds. She is a meanie.)
We are mighty hunters! And sadistic torturers! And loyal companions adorable, furry friends who want you to know just how we love and adore you*!
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We love you! We will protect you from all many-legged crawly things! Unless we get bored of them, first, that is.
We do not like the taste of the house centipedes. Besides, how would you know we loved you if we didn't bring our prey to you? And how would you know what clever, cunning, sadistic little carnivores we are if we didn't show you how we can make the buggses skitter?
We like it when the bugses skitter. It amuses us.
You're always saying we should play nicely together. We wanted to show you that we know how! Now you are telling us not to play in front of you. Bad parents send mixed messages, you know.
Anyway, we're going to ignore you, because we're cats, and that's what we do. Also because you haven't proffered any kittytreats or shot us with a water pistol.
And your bed is the bestest stashing place for dead things ever! Because you find them, and make amusing noises. The other monkey never looks under her bed, unless she needs a sweater. (And she's very annoyingly encased the sweaters in icky plastic stuff so that we can't shed on them and they don't make comfy kitty beds. She is a meanie.)
We are mighty hunters! And sadistic torturers! And
loyal companionsadorable, furry friends who want you to know just how we love and adore you*!Signed,
Luna and Marinetti
* So keep the kittytreats coming, minion!