I did sleep with a Nice Guy once, with the thought that, hey, he's a nice guy and might have mate potential. And I was horny.
Well, let's see. Immediately after sex, he kept asking me what I was thinking, telling me he wanted to know everything I was thinking, ever. Hours later, he began texting me incessantly. Not witty, engaging things. Things like :) and hi, which was short for "Hi, vagina-bearing person, I am a man. Please entertain me! In return you will get additional demands for entertainment, several of which will involve my penis."
After one text too many, I decided to make it clear that this wasn't what I wanted. Keep in mind we were still 24 hours of breaching the so-called friendzone. He told me, "Well, I should've told you that I have trust issues!"
At which point I said, "Oh my god, you do? In that case, I owe a life-debt to you! I know the rules -- if you're a chick who sleeps with a dude with trust issues, you can't dump him!"
Oh wait, that wasn't what happened. I didn't talk to him again. And he didn't talk to me.
But a couple months later, he did post, in a public forum, where I would see it, a post about our tryst and how he really wanted to be my boyfriend. From his point of view, the emotional connection was too intense and I obviously got scared off. He was getting some sympathetic responses -- you poor victim of a heartless bitch! So I had to post and explain what REALLY happened, which was that he suffocated me, not giving me more than a few hours without contacting him or even the right to privacy of my own thoughts, while not really offering anything of interest to me apart from an orgasm. One person followed up with "Gee, I felt sorry for the guy, until I saw her reply!" Because publicly shaming me -- oh, and really classy move posting about what we did in bed on the internet, Nice Guy -- into paying him my debt of sex and mental stimulation isn't something an asshole would do.
I'm now with someone who treats me like a human being. Sometimes he even finds me boring or frustrating, like he would with another real person! And he starts conversations, too, with complete sentences. I was so blown away, I married him.
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Date: 2012-06-27 12:51 pm (UTC)Well, let's see. Immediately after sex, he kept asking me what I was thinking, telling me he wanted to know everything I was thinking, ever. Hours later, he began texting me incessantly. Not witty, engaging things. Things like :) and hi, which was short for "Hi, vagina-bearing person, I am a man. Please entertain me! In return you will get additional demands for entertainment, several of which will involve my penis."
After one text too many, I decided to make it clear that this wasn't what I wanted. Keep in mind we were still 24 hours of breaching the so-called friendzone. He told me, "Well, I should've told you that I have trust issues!"
At which point I said, "Oh my god, you do? In that case, I owe a life-debt to you! I know the rules -- if you're a chick who sleeps with a dude with trust issues, you can't dump him!"
Oh wait, that wasn't what happened. I didn't talk to him again. And he didn't talk to me.
But a couple months later, he did post, in a public forum, where I would see it, a post about our tryst and how he really wanted to be my boyfriend. From his point of view, the emotional connection was too intense and I obviously got scared off. He was getting some sympathetic responses -- you poor victim of a heartless bitch! So I had to post and explain what REALLY happened, which was that he suffocated me, not giving me more than a few hours without contacting him or even the right to privacy of my own thoughts, while not really offering anything of interest to me apart from an orgasm. One person followed up with "Gee, I felt sorry for the guy, until I saw her reply!" Because publicly shaming me -- oh, and really classy move posting about what we did in bed on the internet, Nice Guy -- into paying him my debt of sex and mental stimulation isn't something an asshole would do.
I'm now with someone who treats me like a human being. Sometimes he even finds me boring or frustrating, like he would with another real person! And he starts conversations, too, with complete sentences. I was so blown away, I married him.