The latest from the non-reality-based community

[sabotabby]

Ganked from zingerella, who found it on Electrolite, who found it on Slacktivist...

Gen. Tommy Franks is now a motivational speaker, giving business seminars called “From the Battlefield to the Business World: Strategies that Get Results.”

No, this is not a joke. You know how tight the business community and the Bush administration are, especially when it comes on putting a morbid spin on the "work hard and believe in yourself and miracles can happen" dictum. Quoth Fred Clark:

Local business leaders have apparently been sitting around in their chambers of commerce wondering, “How can I make my business more of an insoluble quagmire?” Or “In today’s competitive marketplace, how can our company create a situation in which we can never win and never leave?” Or “My employees’ morale is at an all-time low after I lied to them into order to launch a massive campaign they now recognize as meaningless—can I force them to stay and pretend they’re happy with some kind of private-sector variation on ‘stop-loss’?” Or “Our company controls only a tiny sliver of market share, we’re completely reactive and we can’t even safely step outside our fortress-like headquarters, what’s the best way to pretend we’re actually in charge and in control?”

My response: "Do you think they've put up motivational posters all over the White House?"

Comments

[rohmie.livejournal.com]

They need some different motivational posters.

(More examples abound on the left-hand menu bar.)

[sabotabby]

Someone mentioned that in the last link. The first one (Achievement) is perfect for Bush, though.

[rohmie.livejournal.com]

"Ambition" and "Persistence" are pretty damn germane as well.

[crosley-bendix.livejournal.com]

Dumbentia also has a few motivational posters that apply well to the Bush team.

[dobrovolets.livejournal.com]

"A situation in which we can never win and never leave" sounds like a good recipe for permanent entrenchment of a management team. I can definitely see the appeal of Tommy Franks to corporate bureaucrats.

[sabotabby]

Good point.

[bike4fish.livejournal.com]

"War is Peace"

[sabotabby]

Why do you hate America?

[bike4fish.livejournal.com]

Lack of poutine?

[sabotabby]

That'd be a good enough reason if I could stomach the stuff. My Montreal family would be disgusted with me for saying this, but I can't see how people put that in their mouths.

[bike4fish.livejournal.com]

I didn't say I'd eat it ;)

[sabotabby]

::snerk::

One Market Under God

[rohmie.livejournal.com]

Perhaps "Tommy Franks" is a snarky alias for "Thomas Frank".

[rohmie.livejournal.com]

A belated entry into the Bush / Sharon photo caption contest, stolen from elsewhere:

"Your pants need to be about -this- high."

[sabotabby]

I think this one needs a caption, too.

[rohmie.livejournal.com]

My wit fails me and commits seppuku.

However, the photos do show that the same person dresses them both.

[sabotabby]

No no no! ::frantically tries to revive wit::

However, the photos do show that the same person dresses them both.
[insert evil (Christian) Zionist conspiracy theory here.]

[rohmie.livejournal.com]

It's the damnedest thing.

My wit, which ordinarily enjoys surgical precision, actually missed itself and hit the guy standing over him with the sword instead. It is now at large and the proud owner of a rather handsome katana.

[sabotabby]

Well, that's a relief. By the way, check your e-mail.

[rohmie.livejournal.com]

Well, that's a relief.

Well, it's still in jeopardy. It traded the katana for a nodachi and now it's defending this peasant village with six other guys. ...

By the way, check your e-mail.

Got it. Good work, Ninety Nine. Do we know how far it is from the conference?

[rohmie.livejournal.com]

I should have said "dudes". "Dudes" would have been funnier.

[sabotabby]

::cue samurai score::

I think it's about a 10 minute bus ride, according to my ex-Chicagoan stepdad.

[rohmie.livejournal.com]

::cue samurai score::

And Toho Pictures logo.

I think it's about a 10 minute bus ride, according to my ex-Chicagoan stepdad.

Again, you rock.

[sabotabby]

I could be horribly wrong, however. Either way, we have a place to stay if we can't convince someone to take in a few houseguests for the week.

[rohmie.livejournal.com]

I'm really relieved.

Thank you.

[sabotabby]

Have you registered for the conference yet?

[rohmie.livejournal.com]

Next paycheck. You?

[sabotabby]

Sounds about right.

[rohmie.livejournal.com]

Having a place to stay was a more urgent concern than the symposium selling out. Hence, that was where my mind was at. Even if we don't preregister for the events, we can still attend everything - it just costs more at the door.