The anti-maskers in my neighbourhood

[sabotabby]

There's a certain weed store in my neighbourhood that I pass by all the time. It's on a corner on a major street, so it must get a fair amount of traffic, though it's hard to tell which businesses are doing well in a global pandemic. I imagine they're more successful at turning a profit off the Devil's lettuce than former hash dealer Doug Ford has been, but that's a very low bar.

Anyway I wouldn't typically care about someone putting a gigantic, tacky weed store in my neighbourhood, as I think it keeps the commercial rent a little lower so that the restaurants I like don't get evicted, but these guys are dipshit anti-maskers. The city very thoughtfully put in some planters when they extended patio spaces into the street, and they're always putting these ridiculous signs in the planters.



Again, normally I'm not a grammar prescriptivist but not gonna lie, I desperately want to take a red Sharpie to this.

Anti-mask sentiment does not go over well in my neighbourhood, so people keep ripping them down and stomping on them. Helpfully, the owners added this to their latest batch of signs:



Now, this is super-confusing. CERB, for my non-Canadian friends, is the federal government's emergency relief program that goes to people who lost their jobs or businesses during the pandemic. You know. The same government to which your a slave.

I did not take down any of these signs myself, I promise, but should you find yourself in this area, it might be a fun game to see just how much CERB money this guy can blow. Like...the handwritten sign is just encouragement, really.

Anyway, today I saw the handwritten sign crumpled in another planter. The printed-but-not-proofread signs had Christmas lights all over them, so...festive.

Comments

[lynnenne]

I hope CRA makes them pay back all the CERB money they wasted on bad grammar.

[sabotabby]

I hope they're the only people the CRA goes after for CERB fraud.

[conuly]

I didn't know you had sovereign citizens in Canada. I'm so sorry.

[sabotabby]

I'm not sure if we have sovereign citizens, but we're definitely a hotbed of various types of far-right activity. It's one of our biggest exports.

[conuly]

This nonsense about birth certificates enslaving you is right out of the Sovereign Citizen playbook. Which is weird, because it only works if you make certain core (batshit) assumptions about American history.

[rdi]

Oh, we do. In Alberta, of course. A judge there wrote a 175 page document on a case he handled as an aid to another judges and court employees who might encounter them.

[minoanmiss]

I am at least people keep destroying their idiotic signage.

[sabotabby]

Me too.

[broken_record]

Why is it such a tiny planter and why are the signs facing each other like they’re talking to each other? Also, people who can’t spell shouldn’t write signs. They automatically look foolish no matter what they’re saying.

[sabotabby]

It's a very tiny area for planters.

I may have incorrectly blamed the weed store. I thought it was them but there's a psychic store next to them and today a creepy old man without a mask was hanging out the door watching people, so they might be the culprits.

[broken_record]

I'm betting on psychics who are probably not real psychics.