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ridemycamel has requested the following:
Unrelated, but I want you to rant about any aspect of the Palestinian conflict and your involvement as a Jew demon in human form. Bitch about Palestinians, Israelis, other Jews, whites, etc. You can direct it anyway you want, and of course, bonus points if you use racial slurs.
'Cause I haven't ranted about that, ever. Oy. Actually, I suppose I haven't ranted on it for awhile, since it has a tendency to not change very much, despite what the media seems to think. But we just had Israeli Apartheid Week here in Hogtown, so the timing's good. The aspect I'm going to rant on specifically is the Palestinian-Israeli debate on campus, since that's where I was all last week.
The following rules are now in effect:
Before bringing up suicide bombing in an argument, you are now obligated to explain why it's automatically worse than any other sort of bombing. Make the explanation good.
When someone's giving a lecture and you want to take issue with what he or she says, wait for the Q&A session. Why don't people understand that?
"Accredited media" means "accredited media," not "some schmuck with a video camera." If someone doesn't want to be videotaped, it's polite to not videotape them. Also, no one actually believes that you're making an independent documentary.
"Questions" mean exactly that, not "long-winded statements describing in detail how your party is going to solve the conflict." STFU.
The latest atrocity is not "the worst [blank] ever." Newsflash: It probably isn't, and it's all a matter of perspective anyway. I don't care if Desmond Tutu says that Israeli apartheid is worse than South African apartheid; it's bad political rhetoric to rank your suffering in comparison with someone else's. Your situation is dire enough without exaggeration.
Zionists are no longer allowed to tell pro-Palestinian and/or anti-Zionist Jews: "You should be ashamed of yourself." Wow, no one's ever told me that before. I'm now totally ashamed of myself. I think what convinced me this time was how you shouted it in my ear. Asshat.
White people must now pass an IQ test before being issued keffiyehs.
The only person who's allowed to call me a kike isbrownfist. No, I don't care if you called yourself a kike first.
The phrase "a secure Israel and a democratic Palestine" is now banned from political discourse unless you're being deliberately ironic.
Palestinians are not responsible for anything the President of Iran says.
Stop coming up with conspiracy theories. Don't you have enough to worry about without making shit up?
No, I don't hate myself. I probably hate you, though.
If you've prefaced your statement with "I think we can all agree..." I probably don't agree with what you're about to say.
Supporters of a secular, democratic, one-state solution do not believe that Israelis should be sent back to Europe. Therefore, telling me to go back to Europe since Canada is on First Nations' land is not a very effective argument.
This is official notice that Jonathan Jaffit is kicked out of the Tribe. But he should never be banned from campus events because he makes them far more entertaining than they otherwise would be.
Anyone have anything else to add? I have a feeling I'm leaving stuff out.
ridemycamel has requested the following:Unrelated, but I want you to rant about any aspect of the Palestinian conflict and your involvement as a Jew demon in human form. Bitch about Palestinians, Israelis, other Jews, whites, etc. You can direct it anyway you want, and of course, bonus points if you use racial slurs.
'Cause I haven't ranted about that, ever. Oy. Actually, I suppose I haven't ranted on it for awhile, since it has a tendency to not change very much, despite what the media seems to think. But we just had Israeli Apartheid Week here in Hogtown, so the timing's good. The aspect I'm going to rant on specifically is the Palestinian-Israeli debate on campus, since that's where I was all last week.
The following rules are now in effect:
Before bringing up suicide bombing in an argument, you are now obligated to explain why it's automatically worse than any other sort of bombing. Make the explanation good.
When someone's giving a lecture and you want to take issue with what he or she says, wait for the Q&A session. Why don't people understand that?
"Accredited media" means "accredited media," not "some schmuck with a video camera." If someone doesn't want to be videotaped, it's polite to not videotape them. Also, no one actually believes that you're making an independent documentary.
"Questions" mean exactly that, not "long-winded statements describing in detail how your party is going to solve the conflict." STFU.
The latest atrocity is not "the worst [blank] ever." Newsflash: It probably isn't, and it's all a matter of perspective anyway. I don't care if Desmond Tutu says that Israeli apartheid is worse than South African apartheid; it's bad political rhetoric to rank your suffering in comparison with someone else's. Your situation is dire enough without exaggeration.
Zionists are no longer allowed to tell pro-Palestinian and/or anti-Zionist Jews: "You should be ashamed of yourself." Wow, no one's ever told me that before. I'm now totally ashamed of myself. I think what convinced me this time was how you shouted it in my ear. Asshat.
White people must now pass an IQ test before being issued keffiyehs.
The only person who's allowed to call me a kike is
brownfist. No, I don't care if you called yourself a kike first.The phrase "a secure Israel and a democratic Palestine" is now banned from political discourse unless you're being deliberately ironic.
Palestinians are not responsible for anything the President of Iran says.
Stop coming up with conspiracy theories. Don't you have enough to worry about without making shit up?
No, I don't hate myself. I probably hate you, though.
If you've prefaced your statement with "I think we can all agree..." I probably don't agree with what you're about to say.
Supporters of a secular, democratic, one-state solution do not believe that Israelis should be sent back to Europe. Therefore, telling me to go back to Europe since Canada is on First Nations' land is not a very effective argument.
This is official notice that Jonathan Jaffit is kicked out of the Tribe. But he should never be banned from campus events because he makes them far more entertaining than they otherwise would be.
Anyone have anything else to add? I have a feeling I'm leaving stuff out.
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Quasi-Off Topic
Date: 2006-02-22 07:08 am (UTC)On the show, the Narn are a vaguely reptilian race (always sci-fi shorthand for "bad aliens") who have red eyes, seem always angry and come from a desert planet. They have recently freed their home world from the Centari Empire (now Republic) in a protracted guerilla war. Despite this, the audience is supposed to sympathize with the Centari because they are the most human looking of all the show's aliens and their ambassador, Londo Molari, is quite the charmer. By contrast, the Narn ambassador, J'Kar, initially comes across as a childish, petulant bully who is not very bright and easily flustered. However, as the series goes on, viewers learn more about the atrocities that occurred under the occupation and J'Kar becomes more competent and sympathetic. I seem to recall Molari once calling J'Kar a "terrorist," but I'm not certain about that.
If it is commentary on the Israeli-Palestinian conflict, then Molari's backstabbing, ingratiating manner, coupled with his thick Eastern European accent almost make him an anti-Semitic caricature. (By contrast, J'Kar almost speaks the Queen's English.)
If so, I don't know how much this is offset by the coolest character on the show, Lieutenant Commander Ivanova, being a Russian Jew. The character had flirted with "Neo-Communism" in her youth (It's set in the future) and her starship sports a big honking red star on its back. The character is also incredibly pessimistic. In one episode in which the station had averted utter destruction, another character breathes, "Well the station didn't go boom."
Ivanova nonchalantly responds, "Boom tomorrow. Tomorrow, go boom."
Have you seen the show?
Re: Quasi-Off Topic
Date: 2006-02-22 07:19 am (UTC)I'm a bad geek.
Re: Quasi-Off Topic
Date: 2006-02-22 07:26 am (UTC)Re: Quasi-Off Topic
Date: 2006-02-22 10:58 am (UTC)Re: Quasi-Off Topic
Date: 2006-02-22 08:17 pm (UTC)Re: Quasi-Off Topic
Date: 2006-02-22 02:53 pm (UTC)Countdown to someone mentioning Firefly in 10...9...8...
Re: Quasi-Off Topic
Date: 2006-02-22 09:01 pm (UTC)Re: Quasi-Off Topic
Date: 2006-02-22 09:35 pm (UTC)Re: Quasi-Off Topic
Date: 2006-02-23 03:16 am (UTC)Also it's G'Kar ;).
Also, the depiction of Ivanova's "Jewishness" was always very very hokey/inaccurate/overromanticized/stuck on as an afterthought. Plus, I doubt there will be Jews in Russia at that time in the future.
"No boom Today, Boom tomorrow. There's always a boom tomorrow." is the quote.
:-D
I'm a dork.
But yeah, I see the parallels slightly.
Re: Quasi-Off Topic
Date: 2006-02-23 03:28 am (UTC)Yeah, but I think that's not mentioned until late in the series, hence the always angry desert people stereotype applies to the audience's initial impressions.
Also it's G'Kar ;)
I caught myself immediately after wards.
Also, the depiction of Ivanova's "Jewishness" was always very very hokey/ ...
I cede the point.
"No boom Today, Boom tomorrow. There's always a boom tomorrow." is the quote.
Again, I'm a bad geek.
Re: Quasi-Off Topic
Date: 2006-02-23 03:33 am (UTC)And no, you aren't a bad geek.
I enjoy your comic book posts, fwiw. ;)
Re: Quasi-Off Topic
Date: 2006-02-23 03:42 am (UTC)