Twilight

[sabotabby]

In an attempt to distract myself from my ongoing anguish and misery, I ordered myself a greasy pizza and streamed Twilight last night and actually watched the whole thing. It kind of cheered me up owing to how amazingly bad it was; I think the main thing that SMeyer is good for is reminding us hack writers that really, anyone can do it.

Anyway, I was struck by a few things about the movie. First, it is an excellent depiction of clinical depression. Think about it. Everything is gray and dreary, no one ever really smiles or laughs, and even the most theoretically life-changing events do not merit much of an emotional response beyond a look of grief and/or constipation. Also, when you're depressed you tend to do stupid things like falling for someone you really shouldn't and building that person up to be the most important person in your life whom you'd die without.

The second thing I noticed was that SMeyer isn't really good at coming up with motivations for her characters. Bella never gives any real explanation for why she moves. The Cullens never give any real explanation for why they wouldn't just eat people, or why they send their vampiric kids to high school over and over again. I mean, they look like they're in their 20s anyway, so why torture yourself like that?

The last thing is that the movie really would have benefited from more explosions, preferably one that took out all of the characters in one spectacular boom.

Comments

[ayoub.livejournal.com]

*hugs you*

[krinndnz.livejournal.com]

So what you're saying is that you want to see the Infernokrusher remix of Twilight?

[mycrazyhair.livejournal.com]

Bella never gives any real explanation for why she moves.

Well, in the book at least, her mom wanted to be alone with her new, young husband.

But why in the name of all that's holy the vampires would keep putting themselves through high school, I have no idea.

[rbowspryte.livejournal.com]

Seriously I think the movie made Bella far more laid-back and cool. Far more redeemable a character than the whimey person she is in the book. I couldn't figure it out.

There was a lot missed in terms of tone from what I was getting.

[jordansc.livejournal.com]

I'm told they go back to high school over and over so they can start out young and therefore stay in one place longer, but couldn't they just pretend to be 17 year old Freshmen in college? I, for one, would much rather spend an eternity taking random college classes and picking up degrees - especially if I knew that my grades would never matter. Maybe, since they were turned young, they're still developmental and hormonal teenagers? That would explain why a hundred year old vampire would fall in love with a moody sixteen year old high school girl.

[lzz.livejournal.com]

I was wondering whether the film could actually manage to be worse than the book. For a complex set of reasons I actually read my way through all the first three books. They do have one good point, which is that they were excellent for helping me get to sleep when I was very anxious and stressed.

*big hugs* for the anguish and misery.

[stoneself.livejournal.com]

so you don't like the sparkly mormon vampires?

[eumelia.livejournal.com]

I'm still waiting for a movie about Jewish or even Muslim vampires.

I mean, as freaky as Mormon Vampires are, they're still x-tian!

What about us Heathens?!

[rbowspryte.livejournal.com]

We got about 50% through it but fell asleep. It was so bad. The chief vampire was like a double shot of angsty liquid drama. Barely watchable IMO.

[springheel-jack.livejournal.com]

maybe I should see it.

[rojonoir.livejournal.com]

I kept thinking of a vegetarian farmer who found his one "special" sheep. So wonderful, so beautiful, and just can't keep his mind off mutton stew.

[thedilettante.livejournal.com]

Hah, I cannot wait to see this.

[ironed_orchid]

I'm tempted to see it.

[rantipole6.livejournal.com]

"I think the main thing that SMeyer is good for is reminding us hack writers that really, anyone can do it."

I felt the same way about the Dresden Files.

[flummoxicated.livejournal.com]

I couldn't imagine going to high school over and over again. Why be immortal if that's how you have to spend your time?

[on-se-dit-tu.livejournal.com]

Also, when you're depressed you tend to do stupid things like falling for someone you really shouldn't and building that person up to be the most important person in your life whom you'd die without.

This is so true.

[purveyorofchaos.livejournal.com]

The one thing that struck me about that movie was that they actually made it look like the peninsula. It's really that green and that grey in Forks. But the people aren't that good looking. Just no.

[lopukhov.livejournal.com]

Butt, butt, ms. tabby! SMeyer is popular among tweens, AND she has 4 books in the series now! Doesn't that mean anything?