The Antisocial Socialist

Situation #1:

Dear Miss Manners Internets,

Frequently, and especially at work, older gentlemen with whom I am not well acquainted inquire as to the natural colour of my hair. They do not do so in the context of a discussion about hair or fashion. This is very different than the kids asking me about my hair (kids ask all sorts of personal questions, because they're kids), or co-workers commenting that they like my new colour.

Internets, it is very obvious that I do dye my hair, as my colour will, several times a year, dramatically change to a different shade of red. Despite how obvious this is, I am often plagued with men asking me:

1) Do you dye your hair?
2) Is that your natural colour?
3) What is your natural colour?

Dear internets, am I alone in feeling that this is rude?

Sincerely,
Hotheaded Ginger

Situation #2:

I find myself often eating dinner, alone, reading a book, at the same restaurant, where I'm on a first-name basis with some of the staff, who are quite lovely. I typically order the same thing—a mushroom and tofu dish. No one else has, to my knowledge, ever ordered that, because other people are always commenting on it.

Yesterday, another woman was dining there with an older gentleman. She proceeded to comment on my food and asked if I was a vegetarian. When I said I was, she asked me a number of questions about my dietary preferences and confessed that she was trying to be a vegetarian, but it was, I quote, "SO HARD." Note that I was reaching the exciting climax of my Serious Literary Book and this was much more interesting than answering the same goddamned questions about vegetarianism that I have to answer every time it gets out that I'm a vegetarian.

Am I too sensitive, Internets?

Sincerely,
I'm a Vegetarian, But I'd Make an Exception For You

[Poll #1646252]

Spacing Magazine is publishing a book on Toronto etiquette, and they want your help. The responses so far are pretty adorable in their bureaucratic mindset (as one comment points out: "Interesting that the Marrakech and Montreal examples were ones of true social interaction and most of the examples in the comments could be codified into a bylaw. We’re still Toronto The Prim then…")

I really don't think we're as cold and rude a city as people claim (though, of course, it depends on the neighbourhood) but we are long overdue for an etiquette guide. Go forth and contribute! I'm looking especially at you, zingerella.